Refiner’s Fire

What is it like to be in the refiner’s fire? What is the refiner’s fire? I ask these questions because in my heart of hearts, I feel I am in the white hot center of the refiner’s fire. There is no where to move. There is no where to go, only to sit and burn.

The vision of the refiner’s fire is from Malachi 3:2. The words of the prophet speak of the coming of the Lord and how he is like a refiner’s fire. But who can endure the day of his coming? Who can stand when he appears? For he will be like a refiner’s fire or a launderer’s soap. Malachi 3:2 NIV

As God has opened my heart and asked me to trust Him fully and completely, I have experienced his love more deeply and more intimately. I am also challenged and tempted in the flesh to a greater degree. I give in too often, and I miss the intimacy and closeness with the Lord. When I indulge my flesh, I am naturally separated from the only thing which truly satisfies ~ my Lord, my God.

So I can waste time pleasure seeking, yet finding no pleasure at all, or submit and obey, deny myself, pick up my cross daily and follow Him. In this process, I must die to myself and submit to the refiner’s fire and allow Him to do His good and perfect work in me.

I ask for your prayers and welcome your experiences of the refiner’ fire in your life. Be blessed! ~♡

Worth the Wait

Sometimes circumstances in our lives make moving forward in a relationship impossible, yet if you truly love and care about a person, you pray for them, and support them even if circumstances require you take a step back. Sometimes God’s plan is to create a stronger foundation of friendship and love, ensuring our priorities are in order. It is a process of dying to self; a process of sanctification.
If we are patient and willing to trust and follow God’s perfect plan, we will be blessed. The blessing may be a wonderful lifelong Christian friendship, or it may be the start of the love of a lifetime. ~♡

The Touch of Spirit…

God began this journey painting a picture of true love, and planting a seed of hope within my heart of finding a godly loving man to spend the rest of my life with as husband and wife.

I also know God often uses these ideals to lead, when His intention may only be to teach valuable lessons, and show how much He loves me.
As I have found opportunities to share my story with others, I hope to bring healing, encouragement, and comfort.  I know my vulnerability and optimism may be seen as naivete or wrongly encouraging idealism and fantasy, yet I am convinced God wants me to share and encourage others.

At the beginning of this journey my world was small and compartmentalized.  I was closed off, shut down, living as a tightly closed bud. The image of a shell tightly closed, much like an oyster where a grain of sand had gotten in and a pearl began forming. With the shell of the oyster tightly closed, no one is aware of the beautiful pearl hidden inside.  The image of a poem by Rumi comes to mind, which I think describes the precipice or the crux of where I was at the beginning of this journey.

There is some kiss we want
with our whole lives,
the touch of Spirit on the body.

Seawater begs the pearl
to break its shell.

And the lily, how passionately
it needs some wild Darling!

~ Rumi

This image of the tightly closed shell and the seawater begging to break in and release its pearl, speaks to my heart and what I’ve been longing for.  I know God knows the desires of my heart better than I know the desires of my heart.  I believe God provided an opportunity to have my heart opened.  In opening my heart, I become vulnerable, yet the beauty inside my heart is now being shared.  The love, compassion, and everything God has placed inside, I am sharing to bless his children for his Kingdom.
Sharing my personal story, I hope to encourage others as God leads. I put it all out there to destroy the lies of the enemy I hear God’s children repeating. I share my failures, flaws, weaknesses, and then speak of God’s great redeeming power and promises He speaks over my life and wispers in my ear in my darkest hours.  I am not naive, nor am I blind to the fallen world in which we live.  I struggle with sin, as I know we all do.  I know as I open my heart to the possibility of love and marrying again, I will face trials and challenges.  This is all part of two flawed people learning to love and relate to each other.  I also believe that as we make Jesus the sovereign King over our lives, we will go through the process of sanctification and are transformed into the likeness of Christ.  The marriage relationship is more about becoming one with God than each individual’s personal comfort and satisfaction.  In sharing my heart and my journey, I have complete trust in God’s perfect plan and will for my life.  I trust this process knowing that as I seek His face daily, I keep my hands and my heart wide open, letting go of expectations of the outcome.  This means I know there may not be a love relationship with a man for me at the end. What I do know is that I give the rest of my life, my whole life, to serving His Kingdom for the glory of His name, using my creative gifts and partnering with others for this purpose. ~♡

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Harvest Moon

Today is the harvest moon. God gave me a promise five months ago, telling me it would be fulfilled come the harvest moon.  Gone is the season of sorrow, waiting, and mourning.  Today I am letting go.  Today in fulfillment of His promise I let go of the ‘very little hope’ I clung to and now realize is only holding me back from all God has for me  from this day forward.

God’s Promise in This Season

“In the soil now, I surrender,  You are breaking new ground.
So I yield to You and to Your careful hand.
When I trust You I don’t need to understand.”
I hear God speaking to me, telling me to open my hands.
I cannot hold on, I must open my hands and let go…
Open hands to receive.

In the soil now, I surrender…
A time to withdraw, stay still and quiet; a time to rest.
There is nothing else to do but obey and surrender…
I am not gone, nor am I buried and dead, for I am a seed.

You may not see me, hear me, however, I am here, filled with hope, promise, and love.
Water me with your love and prayers, and when the harvest moon rises, I’ll be in full bloom; God’s perfect work complete.

New Wine

In the crushing
In the pressing
You are making new wine.
In the soil I now surrender.
You are breaking new ground.

So I yield to You and to Your careful hand.
When I trust You I don’t need to understand.

Make me Your vessel,
Make me an offering,
Make me whatever You want me to be.
I came here with nothing,
But all You have given me.
Jesus bring new wine out of me.

In the crushing,
In the pressing,
You are making new wine.
In the soil I now surrender,
You are breaking new ground.
You are breaking new ground.
Where there is new wine,
There is new power,
There is new freedom,
The Kingdom is here.
I lay down my old flames,
To carry Your new fire today. 

Songwriters: Brooke Ligertwood
New Wine lyrics © Capitol Christian Music Group

Be Still and Know…

In every situation, pause and look for God. He is there, standing beside you in your pain and confusion waiting patiently to lead you. Patiently waiting for the roar of thoughts and emotions to subside until the still small voice breaks through, a fresh breeze soothing the soul.

Through submission, meaning and purpose are redeemed.

 

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